Whew

It feels great to be done with the semester. Added to this is the knowledge that I absolutely rocked a couple of my exams (especially my history one) and the fact that my apartment is finally clean again (after a couple of crazy weeks). So I'm wandering around in a bit of euphoria right now.

I end with a quote from my history prof. said during our exam:

Great exams are never finished...they're abandoned.

Enjoy

Some pictures from my trip to West Virginia a few weeks ago. 

 
I think this one is my favorite. 

Wassailing, wassailing all over the town
Our cup it is white, and our ale it is brown.
Our cup it is made from the fine ashen tree,
and so is our ale of the finest barley.

The VT Nav Christmas party was Saturday. Among other things, I wound up taking some Wassail and it was a hit. While most people had never heard of wassail, or had heard the word (as in "here we go a-wassailing...") but had no clue what wassail was. People were anxious to try the curiosity and the wassail went fast. I should have made at least a double batch.

For those of you who don't know what Wassail is, I refer you here or here, rather than try to explain it myself.

I will, however, share with you my family's recipe (non-alcoholic, of course):

1 Gallon apple cider
6 whole cloves
6 whole allspice
2 tsp ground nutmeg
6 oz frozen orange juice
6 oz frozen lemonade
1 C brown sugar
short cinnamon sticks (a few for the pot, or one for each person's mug)

In covered 6 qt sauce pot, over low heat, simmer 2 C cider, cloves, allspice, nutmeg for 10 min. Add remaining apple cider, undiluted lemonade and orange juice, brown sugar. Heat until hot, no boiling.

For effect: Float baked apples (cored, baked @ 350 for 25 min.) and sprinkle with sugar.

Enjoy.

Where the heart is.

This past weekend the VT Navs were visited by some people involved with the Navigator ministry in Japan. The country coordinator, the head-guy from Shizouka, a VT alum and friend who are ministering in Sendai and some students. It was really great getting to hang out with them, learn about what need there is and get an update on what God is doing in Japan. There was, of course, encouragement for us to get more involved. Many VTNavs have been to Japan on short trips before and the need for young people to minister in Japan was emphasized a few times.

So driving home from one of the meetings my friend asked me the question of the week: "So have you thought about Japan?"

I have---and I haven't.

Right now I am just searching for some guidance. I feel like I'm back in my senior year of high school...trying to decide what my next step will be, trying to figure out what my future might entail, and really not having a clue of what is going on.

From the practical side, I can't really afford to do much. I know that if God wants me to go somewhere, He will provide the means. At the same time I'm thinking of the tens of thousands of dollars in debt I am (happens when you are paying for school with loans), and the fact that I haven't ever had a paying job (only volunteered) and don't have much experience (except some volunteering) relating to my major. My parents really want me to get a job this summer or at least a paid internship, so I want to honor them as well.

But the real reason is I just don't feel called there. I love hearing from the missionaries, being able to pray for them, and supporting them in any way I can, but my heart is not in Japan. It is like Chester. I spent the summer ministering there. I love the kids, I love the missionaries, I love the people, I even like living there (it was certainly home by the end of the summer). I know that I could live and work in Chester and be happy...but my heart isn't there. I don't feel called to work there, and I know that if I chose to be there, it would be me rather than God choosing.

So then my problem, and my real struggle, is: I have no clue where my heart is and I believe for ministry to be fruitful and glorifying to God, your heart should be in it. I suppose that it is something I may find out through trial and error. For now, I know that I love to serve, directly. I like to do things for people, I like to have my home open to people and be a constant hostess. I have a heart for worship. Judging from the feedback on this year's Christmas party, I apparently have the ability to administer and organize. (Perhaps I should rephrase that and say that I have the ability to break down a task and delegate the pieces.)

I know bits and pieces, but I've been looking at options for this summer and I have just hit a wall. I can't imagine what trouble I will have when I look for something to do after I graduate. I have another year and a half (Spring '06!!!) before that decision needs to be made, though.

Between now and then, I want to focus on searching out my spiritual gifts and learning where my heart lies, where God would have me, just a better sense of His purpose for my life.

Those sound an awful lot like resolutions. Well, it is Advent, the "Christian New Year."

Wouldn't trade Christmas...

I do love Christmas, the whole Christmas season...It has something to do with all the traditions I've grown up with. Christmas is big in my family. It helps that my father never really grew up, I don't think my mom did either. Oh yeah, we have fun.

Today was great. I got a 94 on my history paper. I may not be the best student, and I am nowhere near 4.0, but I know how to write a rocking history paper without breaking a sweat. My prof's comments on my paper included "Wow, what a set of endnotes."

I got two new Christmas cds to add to my selection. One is all Bing Crosby, the other all Frank Sinatra. I could have gotten more, they had Mel Torme, Johnny Mathis, and all sorts of wonderful other crooners. I had to be a little careful with my money.

Meanwhile, I think Good King Wenceslas may just be one of my new favorite carols. Although the Bing Crosby & Frank Sinatra duet on The Christmas Song absolutely rocks.

I can't decide whether this disturbs me or not.

UPDATE: Apparently some people were a tad more upset.

Schedule for the day

10:10--Forest Ecology Class: work through 2 equations, bubble in teacher evaluation
11:00-1:00--Chill in coffee-shop working on laptop, sipping hot cocoa, and eating pumpkin cheesecake
1:00--meet with Prof and beg for one more point added to my grade
1:25--Technical Writing Class: eat pizza, lots of pizza
2:30--Law Class: eat candy and fill out teacher evalutation

I do love the last days of the semester....

A-C-C!!!

Was it just me or did the UM fan's "Let's go 'Canes" sound more like S.O.S. by the 4th?

I don't think anyone was listening either way.

GO HOKIES!!!

All I want for Christmas:

to curl up in a comfy chair with a mug of tea and a good book and smell that wonderful mix of spices and old books; to get flour in my hair; to sit and cross-stitch while jazz standards drift from the radio; to play boardgames by lamplight; to use a cookie jar for what it is made for; to spend an evening in wool socks and warm conversation.

That's not asking too much, is it?

Blacksburg Academics

(No this is not about us schooling the 'hoos yesterday, although that would be a really great title for such a post.)

I've been sitting here for the past few hours (I think the counter has just ticked past 7) drinking coffee from my John Deere mug and researching the 1933 Agricultural Adjustment Act. By the way, why is it called research when this is the first time I have seen any of this information?
Ok, that was beside the point (not that I really have one). So, I've been sifting through book after book on Agricultural History and the like finding gem-quotes like:

God made the country, man made the city, and the devil made the suburbs and the country clubs. --Russell Lord

As stressed as I am about all the work I have to do this week (3 killer papers all due Thursday) I actually enjoy doing the research. I learned this system in high school for writing papers (I think my history teacher kept urging us to try it) and it hasn't failed me yet. When researching, I write down each point or piece of data on a seperate index card (for this paper I've got a stack of 200 or so) then I group the cards by category (instant outline) and put them in an order that makes sense. That way, when I write the paper I just have to write transition statements from one card to the next...it goes much smoother that way.
I know, I'm a nerd but it works for me. I really don't know why I decided to post this, maybe I want to live up to the line before buy it. What's worse though: me writing this dribble or you reading it?

Ponder this well and grow in wisdom as you reflect. -- Norman Scott Brien Gras.

A glimpse of life

in the Holub household:

Me: That's a hyphen, not a dash.
Dad: What's the difference between a dash and a hyphen?
Mom: About three years of college.

I love my parents.

There is beauty in a blank page. It sits there new, fresh, ready to be worked. It can become almost anything: a poem, a play, a psalm, a prayer. As it is, it is nothing, empty and waiting. Waiting for the pen to spill over. Thirsty for the blood, the tears, the perspiration that will give it life. Anticipating those markings that will forever keep it from just a plain piece of paper. It spurs emotion into thought, thought into word.

Quote of the day:

This one from Shaun Groves:

Worship is not a song. Worship is my response to God with all that I am to all that He is, all that He has done, is doing, and will do in me, through me, around me, and in spite of me, but it's not just a song. Worship is our response with all of our lives, everything that we've been given to all that God is. And so, if we come in here in this place and we raise our hands and we raise our voices, but we don't stretch these hands out when we leave this place to feed the hungry and clothe the naked and fight for the poor and the oppressed, then what you and I have done is worshiped a singer or a song, but not a God.

Update

My, I've got some catching up to do. Apologies for how sparse it's been around here lately, I've been testing a hypothesis. Seems if I actually turn my computer off on ocassion, I don't waste nearly as much time obsesively checking emails and away messages. I do, however, manage to find other ways to waste my time.

A run-down of recent happenings:
Thanksgiving break is just about a week away and I've had back to back tests. I certainly am ready for a break, although I've got three papers to write for when I get back, one of which I still have to schedule interviews for, one I still have no topic for, and all of which I have more research than I can fathom left to collect. Oh yeah, and I'm in charge of Thanksgiving dinner (because I want to be). So the break part will be not actually having to go to class I suppose.

This weekend I get to play catch-up with reading, cleaning, planning....I never really did get myself organized for this semester and now it's almost over. That's how it goes I suppose.

Ah, well, back to work...I'll probably get some more up here later today.

The other side of the story.

Here's one you don't hear that often:

I was talking to my brother the yesterday (he's been back from Iraq for a few months now) and he's hoping to get transferred to another unit so that he can go back to Iraq.

Funny, the media makes it seem as though all the soldiers in Iraq are scrambling to get out.
I really wish some people would learn that the military and civilian mentalities are really distinct. Thinking that they are (or should be) the same is just another form of ethnocentrism.

And the tally hits 19.

I am stressed. I don't remember the last time I was this stressed (I think it was in high school when I had a 30-something page paper that I hadn't really begun researching due in, like, 24 hours). Over the years, I have had so much stress for such long periods that I have gotten used to stress. So much so, that I don't even realize that I am stressed (or becoming stressed) until I am overwhelmingly so. Stress has become part of my life to the point that not being stressed makes me stress. When I don't have a recognizable stressor in front of me, I stress that I am forgetting something I should be stressing over. I hardly recognize most stress, most stress I can (and do) easily handle. When I don't have anything to stress over, I rarely know what to do with myself.

I know I bring a lot on myself. My time management skills are not up to par which is frustrating (and therefore stressful). I also think I may take too much on at a time, but what can I say, I like stress.

I am stressed. I am God's-going-to-handle-this-because-I-know-there-is-no-way-on-earth-in-heaven-or-any-of-the-known-universe-that-I-can-come-anywhere-close-stressed.

and, yes, stress such as this brings out the hyperbole in me

Today's Assignment:

and the government shall be upon His shoulders

Discuss.

Just a quick note

to let you know I haven't fallen off the edge of the world. I've been idle the past week or so. It seems that when I don't have an overwhelming amount of work to do, I don't get much done at all. I run of adrenaline so much that when I finally get a break, I swing into a state of absolute non-productfulness. What did I do last week? I knitted, I cross-stitched, I read some, I went on a baking frenzy...this week I have some things I should be doing, but I need a bonfire under me before I get anything much accomplished.

I do have some other posts in the works, so don't abandon all hope.

Meanwhile, I went for Cajun food tonight (with Cara who is leaving for CA tomorrow {whimper}) and we had gator. Yep, gator. Tastes a lot like calamari. A little tough. I didn't dislike it, but I wasn't terribly impressed (other than the idea of it being gator).

I found my spiral today.

I don't know that you fully understand how truly exciting that is for me.

grrrr (aka: you may not want to read this)

Usually, I'd be in class by now. But not this morning. This morning I get to finish the massive lab report I was up until 3 working on (and by then I had just managed to get all the data in Excel and only compiled five of what is so far 8 graphs).

I am mad that I have to miss History for this.

I am still frustrated with the data itself. It's quite a pain when you don't have the data set you want and realize you can't get the data set you want because nobody wrote it down--except your group--because nobody thought they needed to write it down and your group only did it on a fluke figuring they might as well be as thorough as possible. It's a pain when you realize that of the 15 or so values for each of 32 different data points, half of them still have to be stretched and manipulated in order to come even close to saying anything...and even then they don't say much..."and then there's Statistics."

My graphs show nothing, or nothing much...but as long as I interpret them to say they show nothing I should be ok.

I feel better now.