Two faced.

Another great game day. The rain was nowhere to be seen. The sun even managed to make an appearance, allowing for me to get sunburn on half of my face....I think I should start rotating during timeouts.

From the "things that make me smile" department:

I was walking behind this guy on the way to class and he actually stopped to look at the flowers.

Judges are funny.

Indeed, as in Vermont Yankee Nuclear Power Corp v. [NRDC]...the parties in this litigation have "changed positions as nimbly as if dancing a quadrille."

Avoyelles Sportsmen's League, Inc. v. JohnO. MARSH, Jr., Secretary of the Army, et.al.

Burning brighter.

I was thinking the other day (scary, huh?) about how I've placed so much of an emphasis on passion in my Walk. I've sought passion in my worship, prayed for a burning desire, wanted to see all consuming flames, the whole deal.

I've decided I don't want passion anymore.

Passion is often compared to a fire, a flame, anything that burns really. People want to see impact and change so they think passion is the key. It's not really the important part though, in fact, flames are inconsistent and weak. Think of it this way, when a smith is using his forge, he doesn't stick the iron in the flames. The flames don't give off enough heat to do much to the metal.

No, to get the metal heated to where it can really be worked with, a smith puts it in the coals. The coals are where the work is done because the coals are where you find the most intense heat.

Intensity.

It's intensity where you see the most growth, where you see the most change. It's intensity that allows for the most work to be done. I think there are many that put too much of the emphasis on passion rather than intensity. I think this is also a better explanation than what I gave before for why I decided not to do [nlcf] this year and am forging on. I love the people in the ministry, and I found a ton of passion, but not much intensity. You can get some of the greatest flames from some of the weakest fuel sources. Grasses burn brightly and you can even get some great sound effects from Rhododendron leaves (try it sometime), but they are nothing compared to the heat of coke. (Yes, I did my research. Hot enough to incinerate metal? You can't get that from your average bonfire.)

Really, if you want to force the metaphor further, fuel/intensity's external manifestation with proper catalyst/Holy Spirit is flame/passion. So by diligently (post on "diligence" coming soon) seeking intensity, passion will follow.

I'm pinging on and on (ok, I'll stop), but I really feel like I've gone from apprentice to journeyman here.

Digital Dropbox rocks.

Today has been a good day.

Got up at eight this morning (this after getting in at 3:15am from "Girls' night") to make a pie for the guys. I, and some of the other girls in Navs, have a standing agreement with the guys in Navs that if they bring us fruit, it will be returned to them in baked-good form. I.E., the guys brought me apples, I made them apple pie. Now I wonder if they'll figure out that this goes for other main ingredients as well. Ex: chocolate chips yield chocolate chip cookies, walnuts yield blonde brownies (ooh, I think I'll have to make some of those tonight myself), etc.

I love baking, especially apple pies because I get to use my Grandma's recipe and I get to make the cool foil ring for which I have just nearly perfected the technique. So the day started off really well, but I don't think this is about that.

As soon as the pie was done, I headed to campus for the first home game of the season. The guys painted up, we played Western Michigan, it was a shut-out game 63-0. Poor, poor Michigan (pronounced Mitchigin). Go Hokies!

But I don't think this is about that either.

For some reason I felt like walking home from the game. It took me about an hour to get from the stadium to my apartment. That's what this is about.

My walk today gave me a really great opportunity to get some prayer in, the best prayer time I've had in a while actually. Neat how God tends to work things.

I don't think I'm all that great at expressing emotions. I don't often cry at movies. I often seem disinterested or withdrawn when I am actually intently focused on the situation. I often seem apathetic when I am really excited and/or eager. I think that may be the INFP in me.

So this afternoon I realized for the first time how excited I am with where I am in my walk with God. Thinking about all that God's been working on with me, what all He has to teach me, what all there is for me to learn was just amazing. Talking things through, talking things over appears to be what I've been needing. By the time I got home I was just about bursting.

So, yes. Today was a very good day.

Sometimes I don't think I'll ever be used to being a girl, then I consider the alternative.

Technical Difficulties

T and I were supposed to meet with our bible study Discipleship Ministry Team for the first time tonight. Yeah, didn't happen.

We were supposed to start with two girls in the group but neither of them came. So, we stopped by their rooms to check in on them and see if they were still interested or not. Turns out that one was working on homework and the other realized that she is going to have too much on her plate this semester and won't be able to commit to Navs. We are down to one girl in the study, and it seems that her priority this semester will be academics. I think that she's interested in joining a group but really doesn't have the desire to.

The lack of a DMT tonight gave T and I the opportunity to talk about the situation. It was interesting that we both seemed to be saying exactly what was on the other's mind.

While we would both love to lead a study this semester, we'd be just as happy in leadership without one. We'd love to be able to plan some get-togethers and help with the women's ministry. Really, we just want to serve however God would want us to.

The way we figure it, the difficulties we've been having getting a study together are one of two things. One, we are being attacked and the delays are a way to weaken our confidence and keep us thinking that we aren't ready to be leading a study. Or, two, we aren't supposed to be leading this semester but God is using this to prepare us for leading either in a study situation or another area of ministry.

Either way, it's been a little frustrating. We'll see what God has in store...

Wednesday's Wisdom:

If God meant for water to be frozen, we'd all be crystaline based. It's unnatural, except in a cocktail.

--Shep

We'll just glide, starry eyed.

I got a Classic Sinatra cd this weekend. It's been going pretty much non-stop since I got home. Hence why I'm behind on my reading for class. I'd much rather dance around the apartment.

I also saw this disc set that was "The Best of the Rat Pack," or something like that. Alas, funds would not allow the acquisition. Oh well, one more thing to add to my Christmas list (oh yes, it's already open and taking requests).

Sometimes I feel like I was born in the wrong decade. Really. I love the Rat Pack, Fred Astaire, Bing Crosby, Jimmy Stewart, Cary Grant, Gene Kelly, oooh and Danny Kaye.....Sigh

But then again, I suppose it's great to be alive now because I have the greatest sampling of past greatness. Great. Really.

Yeah, I'll stop now. (I bet you're thinking that's great.)

I have a hard hat

and that's about as cool as you can get.

By the way

I'm exhausted. (I know, by the end of last semester I was still considering O'dark hundred an "early evening" but I've been reconfiguring my sleeping patterns all summer. Gimme a break.)

Anyway, the only reason I'm up at my computer right now rather than being up in my bed... sinking into slumber.......under my nice, cozy blanket.........with my cushy, feather pillow...................

Sorry. Where was I?

The only reason I'm up is because of the wonderful new lottery system that Tech has decided to implement for football tickets. I figure I might as well get it out of the way tonight because I'll probably forget tomorrow. And I'd rather stay up and get it taken care of than scramble before the dead line. Wow, I've never said that before.

Anyway, off to enter the draft.

Sending out along the lines.

I could use some prayer. For discipline if nothing else. I've always had to struggle to reach goals and I have plenty I am working on for this semester.

For one thing, my GPA is at a lifetime low. I've a 3.25 which is nothing to sneer at but, to me, is painful. Never have I let my academics slip so much as I did last semester. What kills most is that I know I could have done better. So this semester I am determined to make it through knowing that I've done my honest best.

Aside from that, my greatest goals are spiritual. I am nowhere near satisfied (and may I never be completely so) in my walk with Christ. I lack consistency in my quiet times, I lack discipline in my study, I lack diligence in my prayers. Not that there are quotas to be met, but I'd like to get to the point where these areas are reliable, where they become second nature (or first, I should say) rather than afterthought.

I feel like I've been off track for a while, I lost my focus last semester. It's time for a realignment.

and this is what I fantasize about...

While I haven't the slightest idea of what I want to do with my Wildlife Science degree, I do know the where. I have this dream of an office with this marvelous wooden desk and one of those green-shaded desk lamps. I see the walls covered in bookcases filled with dusty books, specimens, collections from my travels. I see me traveling the world, or at least Europe and South America, but always having one place to call home. I see a door with frosted glass and my name in black stenciling....

Now the chances of me getting something like that without at least a Masters are slim, but it could happen. I went to the National Zoo with my parents a couple of weeks ago and there, in the science center, I saw my desk...complete with lamp. I'd love to intern there but, alas, those internships are not paid, not even the slightest stipend.

Maybe I should quit the Wildlife thing entirely and work in a library, at least then I'd have the dusty books.

I have some of the coolest classes.

A couple of quotes from my History textbook, American Agriculture: A Brief History:

Agricultural histories that use this technique are invariably dull.


canal building...must have been excruciatingly hard work

You don't say.

Back to the books.

Well, not yet. Classes start tomorrow and right now I should be unpacking but I really hate putting clothes away so I'm stalling....

Anyway, a quick rundown of the academic challenges ahead this semester:
Physical Geology--Shouldn't actually be that hard (except for the rocks). I'm only taking this because "they" decided to change the requirements for my major and now it is required.

Technical Writing--Another class I'm only taking because "they" say so (just who are "they" anyway). I actually had signed up for it last semester but I dropped it after the first day of class because I knew there was no way I would be able to do well in it with all the other things I was taking at the time.

Survey of Forest Ecology and Management (and lab)--This one should actually be interesting. Any class that requires you to have a hard-hat automatically starts out with a load of cool points.

History of American Agriculture--The first history class I'll be taking for the minor I am adding. I really love History, I'm just not that good at it. Did I ever mention that, after a biological/life science, History would be my second choice as a major?

Law of Critical Environmental Areas--I think that I'm most excited about this class. From what I've heard about it, the teacher is awesome. Plus, from reading the syllabus, the midterm and final exams are take-home. I've never had a take-home exam before, this should be nice.

Ok, enough stalling for now. When I've got a little more done I may come back and right about church. I went to my friends' house church this morning and I really enjoyed it.

Things that rock:
- Cocoa puffs
- Wireless internet
- Having my own room this year
- Being within walking distance of Carol Lee
- The surround-sound my roommate's fiance just installed

Things that don't:
- My bed being about 3 inches too close to the ceiling (but that can be fixed)
- That song that plays from 6:30 to 7:something every morning. It comes from the apartment downstairs, I think, and sounds too much like an ice cream truck.
- Having the water-heater in my closet (but I'll get used to it).


As you can see, my internet is up and I am at least in my apartment now, although nowhere near organized.

Well, with the difficulties my internet has been giving me (as in being completely out the past couple of days) and the probability that we will be losing power later today (what with Charlie headed for us and all), it is going to be rather unlikely that I will be able to post much (which shouldn't make that much of a stir since the amount of people actually visiting this site has bottomed out over the summer) until Thursday (when I move up to my apartment) or, more likely Friday (when my DSL will be hooked up); although, with the shuffle of moving, in it may not even be until next Sunday (when I should be just about settled and ready for classes) before I manage to get back into a regular posting cycle.

And all in one sentence, too. (I do so like being parenthetical.)

Memo:

To the athletes seen tonight in the Parade of Nations,

Olive wreaths are to be given to those who medal in the games. They are to be respected as a symbol of the original Olympics and a sign of achievement.

Wearing self-crafted wreaths that you have not earned is disrespectful to those running the games, fellow athletes, and what the wreaths stand for.

I would imagine that, at the ancient games, such insolence as wearing a an undeserved wreath would result in some sort of censure, maybe even physical punishment. Maybe we should bring back those traditions as well.

--E

Re:Recent Difficulties with Blogger

Continually having to [stop]
becoming frustrated. Being [stop]
-ped
In the middle of each action [stop]
I am [stop]
-ped
and sent to [stop]
at the sign-in screen. (Oh look, I didn't have to [stop]
. Nevermind.) [stop]
That is if I am not [stop]
-ped in the first place, not even being allowed to start, let alone [stop]
a post. [stop]
Hoping it will all [stop]
soon.

Yours, etc.
---E [stop]